Authenticity… What?? How?? Why??

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about authenticity lately.  The subject keeps coming up in the media, in conversation, in what I’m reading.   But it isn’t new.  People have wrestled with authenticity for centuries. Wikipedia defines authenticity as “the degree to which one is true to one’s own personality, spirit, or character, despite the pressures of the material world “.  Some think of Socrates as one of the earliest proponents of authenticity when he warned us that the “unexamined” life is not worth living.  Walter Kaufman spent his life examining his beliefs, challenging cultural and religious norms.  While I don’t agree with all his conclusions, the quote below resonates with me:      “Let people who do not know what to do with themselves in this life, but fritter away their time reading magazines and watching television, hope for eternal life.. The life I want is a life I could not endure in eternity. It is a life of love and intensity, suffering and creation, that makes life worth while and death welcome. ~ W. Kaufmann, The Faith of a Heretic.

A life worth while.  That’s it.  That’s what I’m looking for.  I could spend eons contemplating my navel, and the only result would be a cleaner lint-less belly button!  (There is actually a Guinness-record holding guy who collects his navel fluff…  but I digress…)  Instead, wInstead when my gaze goes upward and I consider the Designer as well as design, I am changed.  I am humbled.  I am motivated to be and do all that I can.  

The authentic life I am seeking is one in which I am all God designed me to be, and that I am using those gifts and talents to do something that matters.

     In my work… that means coaching clients to find and fulfill their life purpose, giving them tools to be and do all they were designed for and holding them accountable to achieve their goals.  
     In my worship… that means contemplating the Holy Other, and measuring my life against His yardstick.  
     In my relationships… it means happily, enthusiastically, unapologetically being me.  It means operating from my strengths, it means sharing my gifts, it means accepting my weaknesses and acknowledging my limitations.  

    ”Human beings who do not want to belong to the mass need only to stop, and not be comfortable; follow their conscience, which cries out: “Be yourself!”   ~Nietzsche

I am currently working on material for a workshop series I’m calling Integrity Selling.  It is aimed at my coaching clients who sell time, products or services but struggle with making sales.  That discomfort usually comes from self-consciousness.  You’re afraid of saying the wrong thing.  You don’t want to be pushy.  You gag at the thought of hawking something someone doesn’t need or want.  But what if you were to shift the focus to the client’s needs,
values, and goals — you might have something to say, something to give. You would be operating from authenticity and integrity.  You would not be pushing something over on someone, but adding value to their life.  

Interested in hearing more??   Give me a call at 319-551-1414 or shoot an e-mail to lisa@vanallencoaching.com  Tell me how you are finding and fulfilling your purpose – with authenticity.

Coaching 101: Coaching Core Values

I am drawn to coaching for many reasons, but the core values and beliefs that drive coaching top the list.  Coaching is so different from anything else I’ve ever done, including counseling, consulting, training and mentoring.  There are similarities and overlaps – but very distinct differences. 

Co-Partnership in coaching places the client and the coach on an equal plane.  There is no expert, no authority, no controlling or manipulating the relationship.  The coach comes alongside the client to support his/her agenda and goals.  This role is very unique.  When I worked as a psychologist, I was expected to be the expert, to lead the relationship toward a healthy result.  As a consultant or trainer, I usually set the agenda and kept my clients on track.  As a mentor, I shared my expertise and experience with someone younger or newer to the profession.  There is nothing wrong with these roles – they have their place.  But coaching recognizes the value brought to the relationship by the client.  Two equals are working together, creating a relationship that fosters growth toward the client’s vision and purpose.

Relationship stimulates growth.  When people come together to work toward a common goal, something powerful happens.  They are able to achieve more together than the combination of what they could accomplish separately.  They each grow and learn and spur one another on to creativity.  A trusting, supportive relationship is the catalyst to transformation. 

Responsibility and Stewardship for one’s own life is fostered in the coaching relationship.  A client’s freedom to manage his/her own life is nurtured.  The coach empowers the client through accountability but does not assume to tell the client what to do.

Believing the Best about the client, his/her intentions and goals is one of the most empowering things a coach can do.  Clients are affirmed, believed in, built up rather than assessed, diagnosed or judged.   Unique Design has been built into every individual.  A coach will honor the gifts, talents, personality and abilities of the client in a way that encourages them to find and fulfill their life purpose. Exploration and Discovery takes place in an environment that is safe for the client to learn and grow.  Personal values, passions and dreams are nurtured; solutions and strategies are generated. 

Integrity, Authenticity and Sincerity are essential characteristics of every coach.  The coaching relationship is based on honesty, reality, and transparency.  Other professionals offer their clients integrity, but few can offer the level of transparency a coach is able to share. 

These are the values I aspire to bring to each coaching relationship.  They are the tools that enable me to help others find and fulfill their life purpose.  What an incredible job!!     

For more information on Coaching and how it might benefit you, contact me at www.VanAllenCoaching.com for a complimentary session.

Finish Strong!

Lisa

Lisa Van Allen, PhD